one small step
Aug 23 2006 12:33 AM filed in: bringing home
baby
I meant to
start posting as soon as we started, but between
working & trying to paint the dining room, I just
haven't had time. So here's a first post to get this
blog up to speed.
Saturday, August 12: After months of hemming & hawing, we finally sent our registration in to the adoption agency we've decided to work with. We attended an information session there in January, and we've spent the last 8 months alternately talking about it and avoiding talking about it; reading everything we could get our hands on; and talking to people we know who either were adopted, adopted their children, or placed a child at some point. G especially was interested in getting other people's perspectives - particularly the perspective of those who were adopted. He still has reservations, but after talking to the woman who runs the homestudy classes at the agency we decided to sign up; apparently it's not uncommon for one partner to have reservations, and that partner is usually the husband. The homestudy classes deal with many of the issues G is still trying to wrap his head around, so we figure when the process is over we'll either be certain we're on the right path or we'll know for certain that the concerns G has are un-workable. We also wrote away for our birth certificates and our marriage certificate, which we'll need to submit as part of the homestudy; I'm not sure how long it will take for them to arrive, so it seemed like a good idea to write away for them now.
Wednesday, August 16: Received a phone call from the agency. Based on the date they received our application, we should be starting the homestudy classes in October, but there's a new opening in the August/September class session and they wanted to give us the opportunity to move the process up if we wanted to. We decided to stay with the October/November session because we've got a lot going on with the house right now - I'm going to have to "nest" in a huge way just to get this place livable before a baby enters the picture, and we've been going full-throttle for three weeks now - and we didn't want to have to switch gears so quickly. We'd also have to get into the office for our initial consultation before the classes begin on Tuesday, and G can't take a morning or afternoon off any time in the next little while - it's busy for him right now with file reviews, training, travel, and then trying to get his regular work done on top of it. So we thought it was better to stay where we were.
Saturday, August 19: I had an e-mail from my cousin C today. She was very glad to hear we'd registered with an agency, and she told me she & her husband are working on their application for an agency where they live. I'm glad to hear that. We've been running on a somewhat parallel course with our attempts to start our respective families, and it's comforting to know we'll be going through this together, too.
Monday, August 21: Birth certificates and marriage certificate are all here. That was faster than I expected; they must have been processed & mailed out as soon as the requests arrived. One less thing to worry about. G e-mailed me his availability for the next month; he has about four open days the whole time but he's not available at all until next week. Which is fine, because we're going next Monday, the 28th, for our consultation.
Which brings us to today, Tuesday, August 22: I've been e-mailing back & forth with my friend J, who adopted her daughter two and a half years ago. It's so funny e-mailing her; I'm very open with her about what I'm thinking, and in the back of my head I'm afraid she's going to say she thinks maybe I'm not cut out for it. But she keeps reassuring me that I'm perfectly normal. I never thought being called "normal" would be so comforting.
And that's where we are. I've got a lot of things running through my head - hopes about the process, fears that somehow we won't stack up... But my neurotic ramblings are sure to be entertaining, so watch this space!
Saturday, August 12: After months of hemming & hawing, we finally sent our registration in to the adoption agency we've decided to work with. We attended an information session there in January, and we've spent the last 8 months alternately talking about it and avoiding talking about it; reading everything we could get our hands on; and talking to people we know who either were adopted, adopted their children, or placed a child at some point. G especially was interested in getting other people's perspectives - particularly the perspective of those who were adopted. He still has reservations, but after talking to the woman who runs the homestudy classes at the agency we decided to sign up; apparently it's not uncommon for one partner to have reservations, and that partner is usually the husband. The homestudy classes deal with many of the issues G is still trying to wrap his head around, so we figure when the process is over we'll either be certain we're on the right path or we'll know for certain that the concerns G has are un-workable. We also wrote away for our birth certificates and our marriage certificate, which we'll need to submit as part of the homestudy; I'm not sure how long it will take for them to arrive, so it seemed like a good idea to write away for them now.
Wednesday, August 16: Received a phone call from the agency. Based on the date they received our application, we should be starting the homestudy classes in October, but there's a new opening in the August/September class session and they wanted to give us the opportunity to move the process up if we wanted to. We decided to stay with the October/November session because we've got a lot going on with the house right now - I'm going to have to "nest" in a huge way just to get this place livable before a baby enters the picture, and we've been going full-throttle for three weeks now - and we didn't want to have to switch gears so quickly. We'd also have to get into the office for our initial consultation before the classes begin on Tuesday, and G can't take a morning or afternoon off any time in the next little while - it's busy for him right now with file reviews, training, travel, and then trying to get his regular work done on top of it. So we thought it was better to stay where we were.
Saturday, August 19: I had an e-mail from my cousin C today. She was very glad to hear we'd registered with an agency, and she told me she & her husband are working on their application for an agency where they live. I'm glad to hear that. We've been running on a somewhat parallel course with our attempts to start our respective families, and it's comforting to know we'll be going through this together, too.
Monday, August 21: Birth certificates and marriage certificate are all here. That was faster than I expected; they must have been processed & mailed out as soon as the requests arrived. One less thing to worry about. G e-mailed me his availability for the next month; he has about four open days the whole time but he's not available at all until next week. Which is fine, because we're going next Monday, the 28th, for our consultation.
Which brings us to today, Tuesday, August 22: I've been e-mailing back & forth with my friend J, who adopted her daughter two and a half years ago. It's so funny e-mailing her; I'm very open with her about what I'm thinking, and in the back of my head I'm afraid she's going to say she thinks maybe I'm not cut out for it. But she keeps reassuring me that I'm perfectly normal. I never thought being called "normal" would be so comforting.
And that's where we are. I've got a lot of things running through my head - hopes about the process, fears that somehow we won't stack up... But my neurotic ramblings are sure to be entertaining, so watch this space!
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